Goals and Imminent Failure

According to well established tradition, this is the time of year to set goals or resolutions in an effort to start life anew. That's all fine and everything, but why is it that most of us set goals regarding our weight--and those goals come into play just after the month of holiday feasting? Does that seem unfair to anyone else? I think there is a certain amount of unfairness here.

So, in the spirit of fairness--I'm giving myself another month before I trepidatiously resume my deprived eating odyssey. Actually, I think I'm going to wait until after I have Cummings Studio chocolates for Valentine's Day. Of course, after Valentine's I'll have to get some Dove chocolate truffle eggs for Easter. It wouldn't be fair to ask me to forgo those Doves--they only sell them for a few weeks each year. And then, of course, I'll be obligated to indulge in chocolate cake for my birthday... You wouldn't want me to miss out on my own birthday cake, would you??? Hmmm maybe I'll have to wait until swimsuit season gets here to start worrying about it. Is that too late?

You know, maybe I'm just not destined to be a successful weight loss kind of gal... I've lost a little weight (check out my SkinnyR Graph!). But maybe I've arrived on some perverse weight loss plateau of doom that just won't be breached.

At this point, I have to ask...
Does anyone feel even slightly inclined
to recommend Liposuction???

What a Waste

It's not really 7:32 pm, is it? I have officially wasted an entire Saturday. I don't know how I did it. I showered, got dressed (in sweats), did a little (very little) laundry, and yet, the day is nearly gone and I still have so much waiting to get done!

Example: I still need to get Christmas packed away, I need to make the beds (ok, maybe not now...), I need to do about a zillion more loads of laundry, and I probably ought to brush my teeth (was that too much information?).

How is it that all my good intentions result in so little action? I guess I'll blame it on my ongoing lack of sleep, the sinus headache, and my annoying cough. Problem is, now I've set myself up. Now I'll be expected to accomplish more as soon as I stop sneezing and coughing... I'll have to see what I can do to extend those symptoms a little longer. :)

It's a Secret!

I know the Secret. Do you know the Secret? Do you want to know the Secret? I'm not going to get into a long winded discussion with anyone, but I have very definite theories regarding the Secret.

I have friends and acquaintances who have been going on (and on) about the book The Secret for the past couple of years. I've had a copy sitting in my office for months. It wasn't something I ever intended to read, but The Boy brought it home one day after a friend at school had recommended it to him. So here it sat, collecting dust, until I figured I should read it and make him return it to his friend.

So I read it. Have you read it? Did you like it? Did you believe it? Did it change your life forever? My answer to those questions: ugh--I mean yes, not even a little, not a chance, not that I noticed.

I consider myself to be a rational and logical person. I think I live in the real world with a healthy (yet acceptable) amount of pessimism. But I also think I have a mind that is open to new ideas--within reason. However, I had the hardest time taking this book seriously. It reminded me of being a kid and chanting to myself (under the covers, of course),

There is no such thing as a boogyman!

And guess what, no boogyman ever appeared. Do you think that's because I willed it? Or because it's just the way things are?

I have a friend who grew up telling her mom,

I'm going to be a beautiful princess--and you can be my maid.

She may be beautiful (and really smart!) but I have yet to be invited to her coronation. And last time I heard, her mom was living a nice life without any obligation to fold towels or change bed linens.

To be clear, I do believe in positive thinking. I believe that a good attitude can lead to good things. But thinking healthy thoughts cures cancer??? Sorry, I just can't accept that.

So my questions to you are these:

Did you read it?
Did you believe it?
Do you have specific examples of it working in your life?

I promise (honestly) not to judge you--but I have to know! Am I the only one who found it monotonous and somewhat ridiculous?

A Plea for Help

It's true, I am affected by a severely debilitating condition known as Comment Deficiency. It's an embarrassing state in which to be, I only confide this because I know you are my friends.

The sad truth about my state of affliction is that there is nothing I can do about it. I have tried to bolster my strength by asking questions, doing research, posting witty commentary... And yet, I have no comments to show for it.

I put my fate in your hands, my dear friends, and appeal to you for your support. My condition is not contagious, in fact, by sharing your comments with me, it will make us both stronger. Do not let me continue to dwindle in isolation. Please, post a comment here and I will reciprocate on your blog.

If I am unable to rally enough support, I am sure my deficiency will spread to other aspects of my life. You can save me--COMMENT TODAY!!! (please???)