You Know You Have Issues When...

You know you have issues when driving 2 hours to the dentist is more appealing than finding a new dentist...

OK--so I have issues, dental issues. Some might even say they qualify as Issues... I'd probably admit to ISSUES if prodded, but only of the dental variety.

I have this recurring dream, during which, all of my teeth fall out. I've had the same dream for years. I'm not sure when or why it started, but it's definitely at the root (tee hee) of my dental concerns.

I was fairly well into grade school, maybe even jr high, before I got my first cavity. I've never had a root canal. I don't even think I have any crowns. But for some reason, I'm obsessed with teeth! I wore braces forever and recently had a go with Invisalign for some touch-up straightening. My current compulsion is whitening strips. Is any of this normal?

My sister recently visited Mount Vernon. And what do you think she sent to me? It was a postcard that looked something like this...


And if you don't think that got me worrying--think again! I think she was trying to psych me out... I'm sure she has some sort of devious plan. A plot... But what she's trying to accomplish, I haven't yet figured out...

But now I'm worried. I'm worried that I'll become that toothless granny with the missing dentures. Let's just hope my Alzheimer's is mild enough that I can at least find those dentures for Family Day at the Old Folks Home. I'd hate to be an embarrassment to my kids! Anyone have some Polident I can borrow?