Cardiac Man

I am surrounded by interesting characters. Not only in my own home, but in the neighborhood, and on the hill. You may recall my post about Chubby Biker. By way of an update, Chubby Biker is making some serious progress! I noticed that she has shed the parka, and I think she has shed a few pounds besides! I'm proud of Chubby Biker. I have no idea who she is, but I feel a sense of gratification when I see her peddling up the hill. It reminds me that anyone can set a goal and progress toward it. Impending success is just waiting for anyone willing to work.

Now, Cardiac Man is another story. He runs daily... And he doesn't just run in the morning, I see him running all day long... I'm not sure if he does a breakfast run, takes a nap, then resumes his exercise regime in the afternoon... Or maybe it just takes him that long to get his mileage in... Regardless, rather than wanting to cheer him on, I want to go rescue him!

Like Chubby Biker, I don't really know who Cardiac Man is... But I have my own story that gets embellished a little each day. I think he was a Marine--I'm sure he must have had an illustrious military career and that is where the importance of physical fitness was instilled in him. The problem is, he still thinks he's that trim soldier with the buzz cut. I think he's deluded himself into thinking that our hill is the hill. Will he ever take it? I don't know. But I'm seriously worried that his body will call it quits before he makes it to the ridge. Don't tell Cardiac Man that I don't think he's capable... I certainly don't want to be responsible for crushing him, but will someone please check the side of the road each day while I'm gone? And if he is breathing too hard, for heavens sake, offer him a ride! I'm gonna worry about poor Cardiac Man...

Actually, the sad truth is that Cardiac Man may actually outlive me if I don't get moving soon!

Some Kind of Frenzy

It's not a pretty sight. I've got five kids to feed and entertain, The Mister is gone for the week, Grandma and Grandpa are coming to stay in my house, and I have to pack for our big trip... I'm not stressed--I've got lots of time, and everything is nearly organized... NOT!

Does anyone know of a good packing/cleaning/babysitting/cooking/errand-running/massage service? Anyone? OK... I'll just get back to it then...

A REAL Haircut!

I was disappointed with my last reveal. I didn't cut it enough to make an impression, and the color wasn't dramatic enough. But how do you like this cut?! I love it!

You Know You Have Issues When...

You know you have issues when driving 2 hours to the dentist is more appealing than finding a new dentist...

OK--so I have issues, dental issues. Some might even say they qualify as Issues... I'd probably admit to ISSUES if prodded, but only of the dental variety.

I have this recurring dream, during which, all of my teeth fall out. I've had the same dream for years. I'm not sure when or why it started, but it's definitely at the root (tee hee) of my dental concerns.

I was fairly well into grade school, maybe even jr high, before I got my first cavity. I've never had a root canal. I don't even think I have any crowns. But for some reason, I'm obsessed with teeth! I wore braces forever and recently had a go with Invisalign for some touch-up straightening. My current compulsion is whitening strips. Is any of this normal?

My sister recently visited Mount Vernon. And what do you think she sent to me? It was a postcard that looked something like this...


And if you don't think that got me worrying--think again! I think she was trying to psych me out... I'm sure she has some sort of devious plan. A plot... But what she's trying to accomplish, I haven't yet figured out...

But now I'm worried. I'm worried that I'll become that toothless granny with the missing dentures. Let's just hope my Alzheimer's is mild enough that I can at least find those dentures for Family Day at the Old Folks Home. I'd hate to be an embarrassment to my kids! Anyone have some Polident I can borrow?